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7 Bad CD Covers

Scott Sorensen — Wed, 23 Dec 2009 02:56:30 +0000

Perhaps it’s the passage of time that allows us to see things from another perspective and question, “what were they thinking?” Personally, I believe bad album art is more the fault of mediocrity. Some schmo doing a desk job they don’t really like gets assigned this work when they’d really rather be snapping glossies of fashion models, like the brochure on the community college commercial art department told them they would be doing.

Here are a few samples of those artists “living the dream.” Oh, and another thing, I claim no responsibility for these CDs and I have no idea how they ended up on my shelves. I figured one day I’d see what was up there gathering dust, rip it, then chuck the disk.

This was my first WTF find…

Live at DollyWood

The dog adds a lot, don’t you think? I think I’ve been to Dollywood, but I was 10 or 11. I remember playing skeetball, but none of the music, thankfully.

They must have just seen Xanadu before coming up with this gem…

Persona

Wow, can you add more color please? I’m dizzy looking at this thing.

I give you, Pinocchio…

HA!Man Best 2007

Here’s looking at you, horse hair. Or do they use synthetics these days? At any rate, someone should tell this guy what HA!MAN looks like in English. (Hint, flip over the exclamation point.)

I couldn’t stop laughing when I saw this next one. Literally 5 minutes almost falling over. Ladies and Gentleman, I give you, Macho!…

Call of the Wild

The Selleck ’stash, the hair, the ripped shirt, the muscle car steering wheel, the moon, you could go on and on. Just in case you didn’t think Aaron wins at life, there’s a fold-out insert:

The only thing this guy needs is a wolf shirt, but he’d have to cut the sleeves out.

At first glance, the Maverick’s album cover is not that bad…

What a Cryin Shame

That is until I opened up the cover to learn who these guys are.

I wonder if these guys even like each other at all. It’s as if the camera man instructed them to not stand on the same parallel line. Or perpendicular for that matter.

I suppose not. Even in a small room with no furniture they manage to not even look in each other’s direction. So much angst. So much deep country hurt. I suppose that’s what they’re going for. Just look at the song titles, “there goes my heart”, “ain’t found nobody”, “the losing side of me”.

What? You want to come in? Sorry, we’re too busy being gruff.

On the other hand, they could be like these guys…

See The Light

Ah, now there’s some close collaboration. Let’s group hug while we write songs about our feelings.

Inside Jacket:

Yup, best buddies. I’m beginning to like the Mavericks the more I think about it.

You may have seen this next one, but have you ever really looked it it?

I Heard it Through The Grape Vine

Sure, you already know it’s bad because its music BASED ON A COMMERCIAL. But have you ever looked at a cartoon raisin. It’s like looking at the guy from Mask. Not the Jim Carrey movie, the one with Cher. These little prune things aren’t cute, they’re nasty looking. Do not want.

Finally, I decided to end on a cover of glory. Actually, the back cover. While I don’t listen to Dwight Yoakam, this guy is obviously awesome.

Case in point…

Under the Covers

Yes, with the boots on. In fact, there’s a whole insert booklet with ‘knockin boots’ pictures. Rock on, Dwight!

Lego AT-AT

Scott Sorensen — Sat, 12 Sep 2009 21:44:57 +0000

Looks like it’s time to assemble the AT-AT my son got for his birthday. I get to be the helper, which means I sort the pieces and retrieve them on demand. If you were a kid would you have it any other way?

Here’s the pre-assembly layout:

Lego Star Wars AT-AT

Obese PE Teachers

Scott Sorensen — Sat, 02 May 2009 16:13:19 +0000

I’ve been lots of different sizes over the years, from extra large, to fat, to obese. Never during any of that time did I claim to be a physical education teacher. However, it has come to my attention that there are a great number of these couch potatoes whose job is soley to whip young children into shape.

Someone please explain to me the technique where you tell kids, during their only period of exercise at school, that if they aren’t absolutely silent they won’t get to do the next activity. This grand idea of the instructors is followed by tubby walking up and down the line with his arms folder over his girth waiting for 5 – 10 minutes while children are expected to sit (during PHYSICAL EDUCATION) until everyone, even the ADHD kids, are as still as possums. Then and only then they all get to jump up and play kick ball or whatever for the remaining 20 minutes.

Where did this so-called teacher learn this award-winning motivational tool, from 19th century English Nuns?

If you think our kids are fat, forcing them to sit still when they should be running until their out of breath doesn’t help. Math and science aren’t the only subjects where the American education system has failed…

Another note for teachers of all subjects, if you cannot pass the class you are attempting to teach in, you shouldn’t be there. That includes running laps with 8 year olds!

TVDB

Scott Sorensen — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 04:30:25 +0000

So I’m doing my part to add to the community, for once. I’m adding images to old Doctor Who episodes.
Starting with Season 7, the first of the Jon Pertwee years: http://thetvdb.com/?tab=season&seriesid=76107&seasonid=9690&lid=7

I’ve just finished with the Silurians episodes. Now they will show up nicely in Windows Media Center.

The Hills Are Alive and Well

Scott Sorensen — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 20:31:16 +0000

Seriously, Netflix. Really?

I think my wife has been going a little heavy with the chick-flicks in the queue. Here’s a trivia question, how many times as Family Guy parodied a scene from The Sound of Music? Off the top of my head I can think of 3. (Stewie in the hills of Austria, Nuns with the distributor cap, and the kids going off to bed) Are there more?

Alas, I suppose they’re right, I would give it 5 stars. *sigh.

DRM Madness

Scott Sorensen — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 19:42:13 +0000

Not that I like CNN or anything. I just like it when they agree with me. Case in point: http://www.cnn.com/2009/TECH/01/27/pirillo.digital.music/index.html (digital-music buyer, don’t be a fool)

Worst Movie Title Ever?

Scott Sorensen — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 00:21:36 +0000

Perhaps the worst movie title with the word “juggler” in it. It’s Night of the Juggler! I’m scared already, and a little curious.

I (don’t) Like Ike

Scott Sorensen — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 16:44:24 +0000

Hurricane Ike came and left his trail of tears behind. Neighborhoods look like bombs were dropped on them, hitting only the trees and fences, leaving the buildings intact. Fortunately I don’t need power to juggle, as long as the sun is up. The down side to no power, besides throwing all your food away because you can’t keep it cold, is the oppressive Texas heat. For that reason, juggling is at a minimum, since there’s no convenient way to cool off from physical activity. There were a scant few businesses open yesterday, and I found an IHOP open on the far outside edge of the ‘burbs. They had a limited Ike menu of eggs, pancakes, bacon, sausage, cheeseburgers, fries, and onion rings. We ate all of the above. That’s the one time I can say I’ve gone to IHOP and eaten everything on the menu!